# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
Randomize
