In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Randomize
