you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
