I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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