I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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