Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Randomize
