i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
Randomize
