Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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