worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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