we're blogging at a bar
I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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