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• (620): View more from Kansas

  Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.

  (1-620): View more from Kansas

  No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.

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• (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station.

  (1-603): View more from New Hampshire

  The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS.

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• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.

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• (317): View more from Indiana

  im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.

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• (785): View more from Kansas

  Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".

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• (905): View more from Ontario

  I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd

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• (419): View more from Ohio

  I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.

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• (541): View more from Oregon

  I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.

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• (518): View more from New York

  #1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE

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• (919): View more from North Carolina

  I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..

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• (515): View more from Iowa

  nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying

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• (972): View more from Texas

  I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?

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• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms

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• (928): View more from Arizona

  How does one un superglue their foot to the floor

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• (614): View more from Ohio

  THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.

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