If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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