Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Randomize
