I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Randomize