We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
How's the hangover?
I've been begging my dog to mercy kill me for over an hour. He has this look like he might do it, you know, as my best friend should.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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