Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
Just high enough for therapy.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
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