well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
I love you.
Bad choice
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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