Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
Randomize
