thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
you mean i was at the winter classic?
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
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