you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
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