found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
