I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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