And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
