Dear Mark, please dispose of your crusty mcdonalds napkins used to jerk it at my desk
discrete masterbation is a lost art
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
