Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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