whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Randomize
