wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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