if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize