note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
