I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Success! We fucked roommates!
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
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