Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
The chlamydia really affected his face.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
Randomize
