I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
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