What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
