Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
my fingers and penis are no longer on speaking terms. My penis is too jealous of where my fingers get to go.
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
she pinky promised me she was 18
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
Randomize
