He is such a slut. More and more my type.
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
