ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
