wrigley field is MILF paradise
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
Randomize
