a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
