one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
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