No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
Randomize
