I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
Randomize
