She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
