party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
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