She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
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