You just made me feel so damn special
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Randomize
