Dude, this chick just tossed my salad hard. All that I could picture was a dog trying to get the last of the peanut butter out of the jar of Jiff and trying not to think of how grotesque my last dump was.
Then she tried to kiss me and I wouldn't and she got pissed off and went to sleep. Then about an hour later, her kid called her. She went home and on the way out I told her to wash her mouth before she kissed her kid good night. Weird night..
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
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