We need to rekindle our bromance
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize
