Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
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