it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Randomize
