You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
Randomize
